That strange little mark on your neck that you so valiantly try to hide is a love bite or a kiss mark or more succinctly, a hickey. When someone sucks very hard on your soft skin (your neck or arm), they cause the capillaries just beneath the surface to rupture. The sucking motion lets the blood seep into the surrounding tissues. Hickeys, so un-romantically put, are broken blood vessels just under the surface of the skin. The blood pools, clots, and turn red. As the blood no longer receives oxygen, the blood dries out and turn into a dark looking bruise.
Traditionally love bites are considered a mark of possession by the person giving it. They are also seen as a mild form of sadism since hickeys can be slightly painful. It can be sexual or non-sexual and are popular in high school.
A hickey is a contentious symbol. They signal to the world that you have done “it” in the recent past. Most people are too polite to comment on the bruise on your neck, but one of your friends will point it out. You will have to tell the story of how you ended up having that love bruise on your neck. It can get embarrassing.
Why do Boys (and girls, too) Give Hickeys?
That strange little mark can be embarrassing and inappropriate in social, professional, or family environments. You can always hide a hickey, but they do take several days to go away. The classic hickey appears on the neck, but it can be anywhere on the body. There is so much debate on how to use your mouth on your lover’s neck. There are those who will let light and sensuous kisses cover their neck and others who enjoy rough biting and sucking.
Having a Hickey is traditionally a “younger” person’s thing. But even they have different views on giving and receiving them. There are those who think it is hot, and some who think it is a sexist brand.
A polite guy or girl will not leave a hickey unless their partner asks or says “harder” when you are kissing her/his neck. The most prevailing opinion is giving a passionate mark in a place where it can’t be seen unless it is for a partner you see all the time.
The majority of 20s something who were recently polled on hickeys did not like receiving them. Most felt that it is not anyone else’s business about their s*x life and walking around with a hickey is an advertisement.
Some did not receive any particular pleasure in giving or receiving hickeys on purpose. Purposely working towards a Hickey is “high school” and irritating. Many sexually active adults see no point in giving or receiving hickeys. There are so much better ways of showing your affection rather than marking your territory with a dark mark.
Although most couples believe that a hickey is sketchy or gross, they also felt that giving or receiving a hickey is completely personal. Hickeys might feel good and give you a “spark,” but the way they look and what they mean is almost tacky. Most would not like to show off a Passionate mark (unless you are a hormonally challenged boy in high school.)
How to Handle that Strange Little Mark
Time is the best cure for a Hickey. You can put a cold spoon on the mark, use toothpaste, or pull the skin around the Hickey taut. Use a coin and push as hard as you can in a spreading motion. Read more details on how to get rid of a hickey.
You can also make excuses about that shouting mark on your neck. Claim you have an insect bite was burned by a curling iron, you play the violin, or you wore your seatbelt too tight. You can also wear a scarf, a sweatshirt with a hood or a turtleneck. Use a green based powder-liquid concealer combination, or tell outrageous stories and lies about how you got the hickey.
However, we should always consider the fact that hiding is never the best options. Over-hiding often makes you suspicious. So, if you feel that hiding will not deny the fact that you got a hickey, then you can also utilize some creative excuses that we have discussed in 20 Creative Hickey Excuses That Work!
The Bottom Line
If you want a Hickey, then go for it. Don’t be surprised, however, if your partner is offended or reacts negatively. If you are giving a hickey for territorial purposes, you need to work out trust issues. An accidental Hickey is not a cause for being irrational. Mistakes happen all the time. Just smile and let the world know you are a sexual creature.
If you need help regarding how to give a hickey, or if your partner wants to get a hickey because its a sign of love, then you can read out our detailed guide on The Correct Way of Giving a Hickey or Love Bite. The article includes every method that you need to follow if your partner wants hickey.
What is the consensus on hickeys? They are awesome to give, but most people say, “Stay away from my neck!”